Mandi Allen
Parental Control in Shakespeare’s Time
The control parent’s had over their children and families in Shakespeare’s time, to today’s many young adults is unacceptable and overall beyond belief. However, though these are the feelings we receive while reading and watching Shakespeare’s plays, we do know that these situations, although astonishing, were more acceptable in his day. Arranged marriages are a perfect example of the control parents had on their children’s lives. Today, arranged marriages are uncommon and rarely heard of; this could be because young adults are entitled to make their own decisions- where to go to school, where to live, how to provide for themselves and for their family, and who to marry. These are questions we are constantly asking ourselves, not our parents. Not to say parents do not have a huge impact on young adults decisions, because they do, but unlike Shakespeare’s time they are given more freedom. Although parental control in Shakespeare’s time was excessive, it was accepted. However, there were certain circumstances in which outrageous parental control was questioned.
In All’s Well That Ends Well, there is an obvious, yet unusual, example of an arranged marriage between Bertram and Helena. Unusual refers to the male and female parts that are opposite than what is typical of Shakespeare’s time. Women were not treated as human beings but were rather objectified. Men were seen as the superior sex, giving them complete control over women, showing that men and women were obviously not treated equally. In the beginning of All’s Well Bertram is handsome, well liked, and, following in his father’s footsteps, is the new Count of Roussillon. In general, Bertram was seen as a superior and he knew he was great. Helena, an orphan daughter of a great doctor, was beautiful, nice, smart, and determined. Although, she has these amazing qualities, poor woman are seen as nothing in the eyes of superior men. Because of his father’s death, Bertram knew he needed to set high standards for himself and when he was ordered to marry Helena, he was quite disappointed by this arrangement because he felt Helena was beneath him and unworthy of his notice. At this time Bertram felt as if his superiority and greatness was being taken away from him because of his father’s death and with his own mother, the Countess’s support for the marriage. Bertram had no choice but to marry Helena. During the period that All’s Well That Ends Well was written, this situation would have been uncommon, usually it was the girls who had no option to whom they were going to marry. Since most people today know that was the standard arrangement back in the 15-1600’s, it was a surprise to see Helena have her choice of a bachelor. However, though this was an abnormal situation, people did not feel bad for Bertram and instead accepted the marriage. This was something to be expected because the King was first and foremost the ruler; his say was everyone’s say.
Romeo and Juliet, one of the most famous plays written by Shakespeare shows an incredibly tragic love story. Though Romeo and Juliet fall in love at first sight they both knew that it would not be accepted because of the war between their two families. However, this does not stop them and they married without their parent’s approval. When Capulet, Juliet’s father, finds the perfect husband for Juliet to marry- Paris- she shut the idea down, leaving Capulet furious and dumbfounded by her immediate decision. Of course his anger was to be expected, not only was she disobeying him, but she was also rejecting the man whom her father had personally picked out for her. However, though this is partially understandable, the outrage and frightful tone in Capulet’s voice and in his actions was unethical. This situation is one that would have been questioned. To a certain extent parental control is needed, but never to the extent Capulet took. Since
Juliet was frightened by her family and angry at the betrayal and hypocrisy of her nurse so she relied on Friar Laurence for help because she has no one else to turn to. Juliet desperately searched for a way to see her husband Romeo again, however, this led to the depressing end of the play. After the death of their children, Capulet and Montague realized the consequences of their disagreements and decided to become civil with one another. “However, if they noticed this before, the tremendous load of pressure on their children would have been lightened and, overall, would have made the end of the play one with a happy ending.” (Halio, 33)
Although, for people today, arranged marriages are a weird and uncommon situation, we forget that this was something normal and traditionally enforced back when Shakespeare was alive. However, not only did parents control arranged marriages but they also had authority over everything their family did. In the play, As You Like It, Duke Frederick was angry when he found out the amazing wrestler was the youngest son of Sir Rowland de Boys, but Rosalind was delighted to hear that this handsome stranger was a son of her father’s oldest friend. With hardly any reason at all, Duke Frederick forced Rosalind to leave court at once and she was banished. Because of her love and sisterhood with Celia (Duke Fredrick’s daughter), she automatically wants to leave with Rosalind. When King Frederick hears about this, he is outraged with anger and commands her to stay behind. However, Celia defies her father and sneaks out. This control can still be seen today but the main difference is most parents would control their offspring with the use of anger rather than with discussion. Another example in As You Like It would be the relationship between Oliver and Orlando. With their father passing away and Oliver being the oldest he, of course, takes charge of all of his father’s responsibilities. However, with this position he now holds, he feels that he can have power over everything. He treated his brother Orlando with disrespect and hatred, not allowing him to have an education, and overall wanting to kill him. This was excessive and irresponsible. Orlando clearly knew he was being treated unfairly and that his own father would have not treated him this way. Orlando didn’t care if he died or was sent away because what his brother was doing was spiteful.
In addition to Orlando, The Winter’s Tale shows more of the control problem that the husband has over his wife. “Even before a woman enters the picture, the play dramatizes a problem in male instructions” (Erickson, 819). Despite the fact that Hermione was being honest with her husband Leontes, he came to his conclusion that Hermoine and Polixenes were having an affair before he even let Hermione defend herself. Leontes was a violent-tempered man, and once he was decided, nothing would change his mind. Leontes threw his wife, the Queen, in prison and her son, the heir to the throne, died in sorrow from seeing his mother so cruelly treated. Because of Leonte’s rash decisions, he was left alone and full of guilt for many years. In most situations in Shakespeare’s plays the men take advantage of all the power they receive and use them viciously. However, though they had the power at that time, they were left in the end with nothing. Then they suddenly realized they should not have reacted with such hatred and they continued on in regret. With this play, Shakespeare shows that not only does the husband maintain most of the control, but also that men were usually harsh and masculine in their decisions.
From the examples listed above it is easy to find trends dealing with the balance of parental control. Whether the control is over marriage, relationships, or overall family it was an issue that was being questioned. Clearly parental control was a situation that was being brought up numerous times, either it was accepted without question or there was uncertainty in different situations. Parental control is needed to an extent, but on the other hand, too much control leads to outrageous behavior.
